Welcome! Come along with me as I try to capture daily happiness even when my jeans are too tight, my keys are lost, and my one elusive goal is to take a nap. This site is all about finding the EXTRA in the Ordinary. You know the laundry overflowing, can’t say no, working on deadline, moving at a mile a minute ordinary life that can be extraordinary with just a little attention.
Have you ever had trouble letting go of something? Whether it’s time to pack up the legos, get rid of college textbooks, or (eek!) send your child off to college, transitions can be tough – physically and mentally.
Lately I’ve been doing a lot of shedding … getting rid of the stuff of life that has accumulated over the last few years and that we no longer need. (Can anyone say Webkinz?) As I transition our home and space to a place that’s conducive to teenagers, I’m trying to remember that there really isn’t anything to be sad about. This new phase of life for them means a new one for me too … with a little more freedom for everyone.
And while I admit, I’ve had a few personal pity parties complete with tears and tissues, I’m trying to keep this mantra front and center …
Cherish the past, but ENJOY the present.
I recognize that if I want to be described as a joyful person, then I have to BE joyful when others in my life are reaching those milestones. This time of year is ripe with transitions. The milestones in life (like first communions, graduations, and weddings) all remind us that time is passing, and sometimes it feels like it’s passing way too quickly! But if you take the time to really enjoy the moment, the newness and the opportunities that each phase of life brings, time begins to slow down and chances to make new memories show up all over the place. Life is a wonderful adventure … if you choose to see it that way.
I’ve added a question at the bottom of this post to get your feedback. If you have a minute, I’d love it if you could offer a suggestion. You never know how your feedback will help other readers!
Extra-Ordinary Ideas:
Read It: The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin … She is speaking my language. If you want to make the ordinary extraordinary, this book will help you get there.
Do It: Put a little fun into your world when you’re feeling like everything is changing. When we re-did our basement teen style, we painted a whole wall in chalkboard paint, and it’s where we all share movie quotes that we love.
Think It: “Not in his goals, but in his transitions is man great.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
Question: What do you do to help you get through life’s transitions? Take a minute and post it in the comments.
I often joke that the best investment I ever made was buying 2 cheese coneys back in 1989.
They were for my future husband at the very beginning of our budding high school romance. I insisted on paying the check at Gold Star Chili because I had a great job developing pictures in the one-hour photo lab at Kroger… I know, what a high roller, right?
When he protested, (not a lot, but a little) I said, “I can afford it … I want to.” Really, I just wanted him to notice me, to know I was different, and to get to his heart through 2 things I already knew he liked… food and free stuff. The rest is history. And almost 23 years later, I’ve never forgotten the moral of my story, you have to give to get.
In our “doing a thousand things at once world,” it’s easy to forget the power of doing something out of the ordinary for someone else. We can all get stuck in a rut of feeling underappreciated and overwhelmed, and the last thing on our minds is doing one more thing for someone other than ourselves.
I once read that if you feel like something is missing in your life, try giving that same thing to others and see what happens. If you’re feeling lonely, reach out and visit someone who may be feeling lonely too. If you’re feeling like no one is noticing everything you do, pick one person and tell her how much you appreciate the difference she is making. Send a card, write a text message, or pick up the phone. It’s funny the way the world works, because you’ll soon find that same thing showing up in your own life on a day when you most need it. If you don’t believe me, just try it.
It’s raining again here in Southwest Ohio. Gray days and January go together here like peanut butter and jelly. That plus the Christmas credit card bill can be a little depressing, or maybe a LOT depressing, this time of year!
As I sloshed through the yard today, I tried to look on the bright side … at least it’s not ice … at least Spring is on the way … at least I’m wearing rain boots.
That last one made me smile because one of the best things about this past holiday is that I passed on one of my favorite poems about rain boots. My daughter, my mother, my nieces, and my sister in law all received a copy of Sarah Kay’s poem “B” (aka “If I Had a Daughter”) along with their very own pair of rain boots.
If you have a daughter (or even a son), you will appreciate the message of Kay’s poem: life can sometimes be hard, but if you look, you can always find the beauty.
In one part of the poem she says,
I’ll always keep an extra supply of
chocolate and rain boots nearby,
because there is no heartbreak that chocolate can’t fix.
Okay, there’s a few heartbreaks that chocolate can’t fix.
But that’s what the rain boots are for.
Because rain will wash away everything if you let it.
During these January days, it’s important that we have our “rain boots” on to protect us from the blahs. Spring is out there, sunny days are out there, better moods are out there, we just have to be patient. I always give myself permission to be a little grumpy this time of year … be patient with yourself too.
I hope you get the chance to watch the first part of this video I’ve included … it is Sarah Kay performing her poem. The poem takes about 3 minutes to watch, the rest is worth it too if you have the time.
Extra-Ordinary Ideas:
Read It: You can get Kay’s poem in book form from Amazon.com
It’s been way too long since we’ve met like this. What’s going on in your world? Do you still remember me?? If I’m lucky, you missed your weekly dose of finding the Extra in the Ordinary. I know I’ve missed connecting with you.
I was shocked at how long it had been since I’ve posted a column… similar to the shock I feel when I hold up my jeans and think those look SO BIG, but alas, they fit like a glove every time!
So where in the world have I been? I’ll let you in on a little secret. I’m TERRIBLE at compartmentalizing … so instead of keeping up the column while working to grow my business, The Playground Group, I put all of my creative energy into developing, designing and delivering workshops last year. And since I’m on the topic (beware shameless plug coming), check out our public workshops for 2012.
Now that I feel like that business is up and running, I’m ready to share my two cents and possibly even a nickel’s worth again. I hope you’re willing to listen. So onward!
This year for Christmas I got a new alarm clock. It’s pretty fancy and lately I’ve been waking up to the sounds of the ocean (only problem is now whenever my kids flush in the bathroom above us in the middle of the night, I wake up too!) Although I’m not crazy about alarm clocks in general, I do love the snooze button. It’s up there with one of the best inventions of all time.
The problem is it’s so easy to keep hitting it. And as I was reflecting on the New Year, I realized there are a few too many things that I’ve been hitting the snooze button on in my own life. That second book … snooze … that trip to Italy … snooze … taking a screenwriting class … snooze. And it’s not just the big stuff, it’s the little stuff too … having a movie night with my daughter, calling a friend to meet for dinner, spending time being creative for no reason at all … snooze, snooze, snooze.
So my wish for the New Year is to be more aware of when I’m hitting snooze in my own life … and while I won’t be able to do it all, I can at least focus in and set my sights on a few long held goals.
So while I’m working on that second book, I’ll be wondering what you’ve been postponing in your own life and wishing that this is the year you go for it!
EXTRA-Ordinary Ideas:
Read It: One of my favorite New Year’s reads … A Gift from The Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh … this is one I keep going back to every year. Gift from the Sea
Do It: Pick one do-able thing that you’ve been putting off that you would really, really look forward to if it finally got on your calendar. Make a space for it this month.
Think It: “The object of the New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul.” G.K. Chesterton
